Tax Day

Today is the deadline for paying my tax. I paid it at 4:42pm. I always put off doing my tax return until the depths of January when it starts to put knots in my stomach – every single bloody year, I never learn!!

But I figure that I might as well definitely put off actually paying the money until pretty much the last possible moment, you know, just in case I get hit by a bus or fall down a lift shaft or something. At least that way I figure that my wife can probably keep the money. Well, maybe – knowing HMRC they probably even make you pay if you’re dead, plus interest! – bastards!

Anyway I’m not dead, I’m still most definitely alive… I’ve not been crossing roads without holding the hand of an adult, and I’ve only been using the stairs – and in the end it’s cost me hasn’t it. It’s expensive being alive, and there’s way too much bloody admin!

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About me...

I am a stand-up comedian from Liverpool. I am blind, and I live with my wife and young daughter in South West London.

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